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Posted August 11, 2010 by Suzanne Jackson in In The News
 
 

For better or worse or is he simply a love rat….??

What is love??

I dont think many truly have the answer to this question…but after asking a few people their opinion, the answers that came back all had a similar thread…. love is a shared feeling between two people who have a deep interest in one another’s happiness.

Love in my opinion is the total surrender of your heart to another person with the security of knowing they will treat it better than you will. Love should feel good, it should not feel bad. Love should make you want to be a better person, Love is not demanding of your spirit but lifts it and makes it glow. Love is a good thing and they say anything less is simply lust,a deep friendship or attraction.

So with this is place…. what leads people to cheat?? Lately our media has bombarded us with write ups of infidelity, betrayal and cheating love rats! Why are so many people cheating in soceitey today? Is it an insecurity within one-self, or is it a merely an act of anger, boredom or temptation?

Today- lets take a look at some of the cases…


Definition of a Love Rat:

Someone who cheats, commits adultery or two-times in a relationship. In short they have affairs with one or more people.

Case 1. Ashely Cole and Cheryl Tweedy
Ashley met the beautiful Cheryl in September 2004 and was said to have fallen head over heels in love with her instantly, they married on 15 July 2006. In January 2008, the couple almost separated after allegations were made that Cole had had affairs with not one BUT three other women. He however denied the allegations and the couple stayed together. On 23rd February 2010 that the couple announced their split and three months later Cheryl filled for divorce.
Ashley had cheated with on Cheryl with a girl named Amy Walton- a 26yr old blonde hairdresser and mum of one from south London. It was widely talked about how this girl let herself down by sleeping with a man A: who was married and B: who puked twice before he slept with her?!

Amy spoke to the press and gave clear details on how many times they slept together that night and even different positions they tried. Aimee also stated in one of her interviews to the press that Cole had assured her that Cheryl “knows what I do” – but still pleaded with her not to tell anyone what had happened. Ashley took Amy to a flat in North London where Both he and Cheryl were living when they met back in 2004 and guess what…. Nine months later he proposed to Cheryl on holiday in Dubai. Makes ya sick- doesn’t it??


In 2010 more girls came out of the wood work telling the press about their heated sex rants and sex texts conversations they had with him- these allegations came a week after details of his phone fling with topless model Sonia Wild, 28 were revealed.The question here is, can you really forgive and take someone back when they have broken the most importatnt bond and vow made between two people?? Ashely cole here- proved not!








Case 2. Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren

Elin and Tiger met in 2001 at the British Open in England. Elin was working as an au pair to Jesper Parnevik, a Swedish golfer. In November 2003 Tiger proposed to Elin at the South African Shamwari Game Reserve while they were on a romantic walk at sunset. In October 2003 Tiger married Elin at a lavish, exclusive and elaborate sunset wedding location in Barbados- costing just under 2million dollars. Later in 2007 ttheir first child was born- Sam Alexis Woods and in 2009 their second child, Charlie Axel Woods arrived..

All seems like the perfect family life here, but this was not the case… Tiger this year has been branded the biggest love rat of them all in recent media….!!
Tiger Woods has been linked to so many women, it’s hard to keep track of them all, but to help you out- Ive put together a list (with pictures) of Tiger’s mistresses!

Here’s the eight women linked to the world’s top golfer, with corresponding images below

(left to right)


1. Rachel Uchitel. NYC club hostess. The first mistress linked to Woods, sparking his fight with wife Elin, which led to his car crash. His emails suggest he was falling for Rachel, but now she’s just worried what diseases he may have given her.

2. Jamie Grubbs. Cocktail waitress. Had 31-month-long affair with Woods and coughed up the voicemail to prove it. Thinks we are dumb enough to believe her when she says she didn’t know he was married.


3. Kalika Moquin. Club manager/promoter from Las Vegas.

4. Jamie Jungers. Cute, but totally trashy lingerie model from Vegas. Says she spent Tiger’s money on liposuction during the time they were together.

5. Mindy Lawton. Trailer park waitress from Orlando. She told press Woods’ wife Elin was pregnant during their affair, and that Tiger hates condoms.

6. Cori Rist. Aspiring, mostly failed model. Met Woods at a Manhattan club last year. Was married herself (with a child) throughout her fling with Woods.

7. Holly Sampson. Former porn star. Says she first met Tiger at his bachelor party… where they had sex.

8. Joslyn James. Current porn star.

My god- how did he keep up with all these women and only get found out this year??


Elin, his wife has since filed for divorce- you go girl..!


The UK’s Sun are reporting that the Tiger Woods & Elin Nordegren divorce is final, with only a filing in Orlando County Court remaining.“Everything’s signed. Elin is ready to file for divorce at Orlando County Court,” says an inside source. “She expects to sometime in the next seven days.”

The settlement Elin is to receive, which has become the subject of much debate in recent weeks, is reportedly valued in the neighborhood of $750 million!!!

Yes, three-quarters of a billion dollars, believed to be the biggest payout of a celebrity divorce ever.

There are conditions, however, according to reports:

  • Tiger may not bring any other females around their children.
  • Elin can never publicly speak about his various mistresses.
  • Elin gets full custody of the kids but they share legal custody.

That means Tiger will share decisions about the kids and Elin will not be able to permanently relocate them to her native Sweden anytime soon.

The lesson learnt here- a cheater always get caught out and looses everything dear to them.



Cheating

Every person has their own definition of what they consider ‘cheating’. Even the dictionary definition of the word varies. One claims that it is the ‘act of being sexually unfaithful’ to a partner or spouse while another states that it is the act of ‘violating accepted standards’. The problem is what is the standard?

Some people believe that in order for a partner to be cheating, they must have engaged in some kind of physical contact with another person. This could be anything from dancing right through to sex. While others feel that emotional cheating is just as bad and in many cases can be even more devastating.

What is important is that both partners agree on what is and is not acceptable.

How do you define cheating?

  • Sleeping with another person
  • Kissing another person
  • Flirting online- live chatting or private mailing….this is a big one with social networks such as Facebook at hand
  • Flirting in public or over text
  • Keeping secrets
  • Buying gifts
  • Phone sex
  • Cyber sex
  • Exchanging photos
  • Developing a crush
  • Denying a relationship you are involved in
Maybe, cheating should be described as doing anything that your other half would consider as being hurtful, unacceptable or deceitful. Would your bf/gf feel betrayed by your actions? Do you feel betrayed by theirs?There is no right or wrong in how you define cheating as long as you discuss the issue with the other person. Problems in many relationships begin when two people do not agree on their definition of this topic. What may be acceptable to one person is an absolute NO-GO to the other.

In my opinion, if either party is doing something that they know the other person would find unacceptable, then maybe that’s what cheating is. Communication is the key…. Ensuring that both people involved in the relationship understands exactly what the other person expects and visa versa.



As with almost everything in today’s world, values and morals are changing. That does not mean they are wrong, they are merely new or different. Technology has opened a whole new set of doors that previous generations did not even have to consider. The important thing in any relationship is to let each other know what is and is not acceptable to each other.

Signs That Your Boyfriend/Girlfriend is Cheating
  • Warning signals NOT to be Ignored
  • Changes in work schedule. Bf/Gf is either leaving early or coming home late.
  • He/She is unavailable at times when they normally should be.
  • He/She stops asking for your opinion and advice.
  • Makes plans without consulting you.
  • Spends less time with you.
  • Goes out with the ‘boys’ more than he used to/Goes out with ‘girls’ more than she used to.
  • Does not want you to use his/her phone.
  • Deletes history of calls on his/her phone.
  • Changes the way he/she dresses.
  • Starts asking about how faithful you are.
  • The phone rings and he/she does not answer it.
  • Putting passwords on computers and phones if he/she has not done before
  • He/she wont go on Facebook when you are around.
  • He/She wont open a text on front of you.


So there you have it…
Cheating can be a range of different actions taken by one but know that eventually the cheater will always get caught out and at the end of the day, they will loose everything loving around them. Its a cowardly act and a very hard decision for the other party to have to make about their relationship going forward, do you walk away or leave them in their own mess and guilt to suffer?
Option one – stay with them?
Forgive, try to forget and move on and in the back of your mind live with the possibility of been absolutely humiliated all over again..?OR

Option two – Leave them?

Break up/ File for divorce and leave with even the little bit of self dignity you have left and move on?

Its very hard to say really how one would act in this situation as I really believe you have to be in the predicament to know which option you would take. Love clouds the mind and decisions something are hard to make because of this. Whatever you do- know that you have to look after number one and somewhere down the line forgive others, life is a book of lessons and we are all here for the learning, its whether you choose to learn or keep making mistakes?

Live by the motto, ‘treat others as you would like to be treated’ and you wont go far wrong with this is mind.

Enjoy,
Much Love,
Sue xxx